Parenting Coordination
You and your ex can agree on one thing:
You want your kids happy & healthy!
Raising children is already hard...
Raising children is already hard...
- What's their living situation? How will they get to school?
- What happens when conflict arises, in schedule or method?
- How will this impact holidays, celebrations, important events?
- What about healthcare, college savings, and other long-term plans?
- Where do the grandparents and relatives fit in?
- Who handles things like doctor appointments and activities?
"When people are divided, the only solution is agreement."
— John Hume
But you and your ex can make it work!
- Learn empathetic listening and positive communication.
- Practice self-awareness & emotional management.
- Develop your shared vision for a happy, healthy future.
- Break down this huge transition into small weekly steps.
- Learn systems, exercises, and techniques for staying on track.
- Show your kids that getting help can yield wonderful results!
"When people are divided, the only solution is agreement."
— John Hume
Parenting Coordination
Parental conflict affect kids, no matter how well you think you hide it from them. All parents want the best for their children—but that doesn’t always translate to agreement.
We can help you develop a strategic and child-focused approach to co-parenting. Whether you’re in conflict or not, we’re here guide you through the challenges of raising children with your ex.
“Paula is an absolute gem to work with – from the very first meeting I was certain I was in the right hands. She has the tools to help you reflect, and more than enough knowledge to break it down and guide you.”
— Brooke H.
I'm a divorced parent; I know it's not easy.
But keeping focus on the kids, we can clear the path ahead!
I'm Dr. Paula Fendley
DIVORCE TRANSITION COACH & PARENTING COORDINATOR
I’ve been a single parent, a successful co-parent, and a child of co-parents (who really struggled and could have used some positive coaching). I understand how difficult and frustrating it can be—and I completely empathize with divorced parents who struggle to raise their children together.
I help co-parents (and sometimes their children) learn how to adjust, strategize, and build a new future together—and for co-parents in conflict, I can serve as a court-appointed parenting coordinator.
So what is a parenting coordinator exactly?
Co-parenting can be a rocky journey
Even co-parents who get along, occasionally have disagreements or conflicts. A parenting coordinator helps keep things moving forward; from communication & planning, to decision-making & adjusting, as need be.
Working with a parenting coordinator may be encouraged by a family attorney, or if necessary appointed by the court to ensure the child’s needs are met.
Parenting Coordinator keys:
- Encouraged or court-ordered
- For high-conflict families
- Supervisory & compliance role
- Confidential—cannot testify about sessions
- Focused on the children's best interest
A parenting coordinator is a neutral third-party professional who helps high-conflict divorced parents resolve conflict and learn to communicate more effectively, as they make joint decisions about their children’s education, extracurriculars, healthcare, and other important child-rearing aspects.
Parenting coordinators do not serve as counselors or family therapists—but rather strategists and supervisors who ensure that the child’s best interests stay front and center, regardless of the circumstances. Our job is to provide:
- Parenting education
- Perspective & clarity
- Oversight & accountability
- Monitoring & mediation
- Advocacy & support
- Creative solutions to high-conflict problems
When there’s too much conflict for divorced parents to move forward on their own, a parenting coordinator can help them develop and implement their parenting plans, and make sure the focus is always on the children’s best interests. Parenting coordinators also serve as educators, offering knowledge and resources about childhood development, communication skills, co-parenting methods, etc.
Parent coordinators and co-parenting coaches both:
- Assess & identify problems
- Clarify visions & priorities
- Facilitate effective communication
- Incorporate proven methods for dispute resolution
- Teach strategies for collaborative parenting
- Make sure possession orders (i.e. custody arrangements) are being followed.
Effective parent coordination can help reduce conflict, minimize time in court, and cut down related expenses. We are NOT able to amend court-ordered plans for child support or custody.
If a court has ordered you to work with a parenting coordinator, their requirements will specify the duration (often something like 8-12 sessions) along with any other parameters they deem necessary for the best interests of the children.
Here’s roughly how the process will go:
- Meet individually with each parent
- Together strategize and prioritize issues to work on
- Meet for the designated number of sessions
- Work on specific goals and exercises between sessions
- Send a report to the court (if necessary) that the order is complete
If you aren’t mandated but just want help being the best co-parents possible, the timeline can be more flexible. We may meet more often at first, and taper off to something like monthly maintenance sessions. Then we can ramp up again before important or complex events such as school starting, or the holidays, or planning out summer break before it begins.
Have more questions about co-parenting? Ask us!
We can work with you whether or not you have a court order! For divorced families who aren’t embroiled in conflict but still want help making the best decisions possible, a co-parenting coach offers expert knowledge, insights, and accountability to keep your path moving in the right direction.
Our job is to help you discuss, develop, and implement major parts of your parenting plan—like deciding between co-parenting vs. parallel parenting. With years of experience working with all sorts of clients, we’re able to find creative solutions to problems that seem impossible. More importantly, we can guide you in a way that keeps new problems from arising.
Sessions are one hour, usually weekly at first—and we’ll discuss what you worked on that week; your progress and struggles, your goals and practices. Then you’ll get some homework for the next week, like journaling, time-blocking, or gains-tracking.
But before all that, we’ll start with a discovery call—and figure out our timeline and strategy based on your specific needs and circumstances.
Paula is a full experience and truly a blessing…she is here to help do God’s work. It’s not just a job for her, or about the money.